Starting off sad and alone at the bar, sadness turns into pounding drinks back and getting wasted, sun rises, I wake up hungover with a lack of memory- mortified to find a resemblance of Jules with a more prominent stache in my bed. Im not totally sold on the second to last frame I have but not really sure how to set it up. Open to suggestions, and any suggestions for simple, yet suggestive ways to add more of an environment to a few of the frames. I tried to do action-to-action in the set of frames where Im drinking, and tried to either do subject-to-subject and or scene-to-scene with the last frames, but not sure if they really count.
Tyler,
ReplyDeleteLooking good! You did a nice job on the transitions, and I really like the way you've organized the panels on your page. Great job with keeping consistent with your character too... Some suggestions: As the sun is rising, I would love to see a silhouette of your drunk character walking home - maybe all the way to the right side of the frame so we don't see if there is anyone with you. That will help us know that you've gone from location to location. I think you might need a 3rd panel in your conclusion - something in between the panels of you waking up and discovering "Jules" that could read more action-to-action - maybe the scene is more birds eye/pulled back and we see you realizing there is someone else in the bed - maybe we just see a lump and you are patting the sheet? Then the last panel you are pulling back the sheet to reveal the person in your bed? Any questions let me know!
allison